Canadian government turns to Clinton to rescue failing email project

The federal department in charge of creating a single email-system for the Government of Canada is turning to US Presidential hopeful Hillary Clinton after the project facing further delays with the roll More »

Cruz drops out of US Presidential race to run for Tory leadership

US Republican presidential hopeful Sen. Ted Cruz has dropped out of the nomination race to run for the leadership of the Conservative Party of Canada. Cruz, who is trailing Donald Trump in More »

KPMG to buy CRA under privatization deal

KPMG, the accounting company implicated in an offshore tax evasion scandal, is set to purchase the Canada Revenue Agency, under a privatization deal announced today by the federal government. Privatization of the More »

Alberta Kudatah: Walmart Pooch overthrows Notley

Hoontah leader Clark appointed Supreme Leader Albertans woke up this morning to the news that Alberta NDP leader Rachel Notley, who was sworn in as Premier of the province last May, had More »

Liberal government to ban use of term “Islamic State”

The Liberal government will introduce legislation to ban the use of “Islamic State” to refer to the terror group who have taken over large swathes of land in Syria and Iraq and More »

 

Alberta Kudatah: Walmart Pooch overthrows Notley

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Hoontah leader Clark appointed Supreme Leader Albertans woke up this morning to the news that Alberta NDP leader Rachel Notley, who was sworn in as Premier of the province last May, had fled Alberta following the Walmart Pooch, while the hoontah that led the kudatah had appointed their leader George Clark as the Supreme Leader.

Academy: “We just picked the white people Hollywood sent out there.”

  Directors, studios deny prejudice Hollywood spokesmen turned out in force Monday to defend LA’s film industry, saying that the awards that some are calling “The whitest Oscars since the great bleach incident of ’54″ have been unfairly attacked. “Our industry is the most progressive in America,” said Blanche Bianchi Leblanc. “We strongly believe in

Trump Aides Wonder Where That Brimstone Smell Keeps Coming From

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Candidate’s aroma ‘increasingly troublesome’ As the US primaries wear on, Trump staffers are increasingly puzzled by the persistent smell of brimstone, with the smell becoming the topic of campaign breakroom conversation. “At first, I was inclined to write it off to an exotic musk,” said Trump aide Fred Silos. “You never know what Donald will

Liberal government to ban use of term “Islamic State”

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The Liberal government will introduce legislation to ban the use of “Islamic State” to refer to the terror group who have taken over large swathes of land in Syria and Iraq and are linked to the recent spate of terror attacks in the Middle East, Africa and Europe, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau announced today. “The

Stray cats bring dignity to G-20 Summit

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World grateful for feline frankness in the midst of deceit The world watched in relief as three stray cats, managing to elude security, crossed the stage of the G-20 summit. In the process the creatures’ sobriety and dignity took global attention away from the assembled dignitaries. “At last, there’s something here that doesn’t offer unrealistic

Suh Apologizes to Mother For Cursing

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“It’s not like injuring someone, it’s not excusable” Miami Dolphins tackle Ndamukong Suh gave an emotional apology to his mother on Wednesday, appearing on TV after swearing audibly during the Dolphins’ Nov.8 loss to the Buffalo Bills. “I’m sorry, Ma, it was very unprofessional” said the emotional Suh. “This is not the sort of behavior

Starbuck’s Coffee Cup Kerfuffle

New minister promises better climate change for all Canadians

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Canada’s new Minister of Climate Change today promised better climate change for all Canadians and chided the previous government for poor handling of the file. “What’s this? Global warming for ants?” Catherine McKenna asked, waving a report that forecast a global temperatures rise of 2C by the end of the century. “This would mean that

Media’s Lips Cemented to Justin Trudeau’s Posterior

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Top surgeon, construction specialist consulted on removal process In a physical mishap worthy of House, the collective lips of the national media have become cemented to the posterior of the new Prime Minister. “We didn’t see it coming,” said Toronto Star editor Michael Cooke. “One minute we were printing the Op-Ed ‘Cabinet reflective of modern

Canada prepares to bid farewell to the best prime minister in almost a decade

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Canadians coast to coast to coast are preparing to bid farewell on Wednesday to Stephen Harper, widely considered to be the best prime minister Canada has had in almost a decade, as PM-designate Justin Trudeau finally gets ready to be sworn in as the nation’s new leader. “It will be sad to say goodbye to