McCain to young voters: I told you I was cooler than Barack

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McCain fundraiser Emily Pitha was arrested  Wednesday on charges of running a meth lab, and no one was more devastated than Senator John McCain. The hardest blow of all for the Arizona senator was dealing with what might have been.

“If I had known John (Kyl) had a meth-cooker on his staff I could have scored big with young voters in 2008,” the 79-year-old Arizona senator said.  “I would have added major coolness points.”

“Breaking Bad started its run that year,” he added.  “I could have been the political Walter White.”

Some analysts doubt whether meth-cooking expertise would have been an asset to the Republican campaign.

“Young people may like Breaking Bad,” said CNN analyst Bob Loblaw, “but that doesn’t mean they want the President to be a gangster.  That’s why Dick Cheney is unpopular.

“Ultimately,” he added, “he resembled a James Bond villain a little too much.
But worse than that for McCain, ghetto residents could have associated him with an ugly trip.”

The Senator refuted these arguments.

“Young people’s morals have been warped by cheese-crackers and rap music,” the Senator argued. “Young voters, I told you I was cooler than Barack.  McCain stops the D-Train by being insane in the membrane.”

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