Academy: “We just picked the white people Hollywood sent out there.”



Directors, studios deny prejudice

Hollywood spokesmen turned out in force Monday to defend LA’s film industry, saying that the awards that some are calling “The whitest Oscars since the great bleach incident of ’54″ have been unfairly attacked.

“Our industry is the most progressive in America,” said Blanche Bianchi Leblanc. “We strongly believe in minority representation, especially in the supporting actor category. Our leaders donate to Democrats, and support gay marriage.

When questioned about the dearth of black and Latin actors in this year’s Oscars and Golden Globes, Leblanc replied, “Did you see we support gay marriage? Maybe you should think about that some more.”

The responses did not sit well with black entertainers.

“Hollywood considers itself white,” said longtime director Spike Lee. “If you’re not the best friend of a white protagonist in a story, you probably won’t appear. Hollywood is Oreoville.”

When questioned about the term, Lee explained: “Blacks are on the outside, and whites are on the inside. And let me tell you, Hollywood is just as sweet and seductive. You just replace the sugar with cocaine. ”

Studio bosses refused to speak to the media, and released an announcement that they are “Not going to comment” on why clergy and other ‘traditional’ occupations are so far ahead of Hollywood in female and minority representation.

“We are happy to report that, contrary to vicious slander, Hollywood’s gender equality is on par with welding and other physically taxing, blue-collar trades,” Leblanc said.

“Hollywood continues to work towards being a bastion of equality. Thanks to slow-motion replays of blondes in bikinis, we anticipate women will soon have 30% of the screen time.

“Now that,” she added, easing her pants slightly downward, “is progress.”

One Response to Academy: “We just picked the white people Hollywood sent out there.”

  1. vanesa says:

    ok, first, ‘black’ people, stop pointing that you are so different you need your own category. holy fuck. dont work in hollywood then if the bane of things for you is blacks not getting nominated. you sound like you automatically think you deserve a nomination, quit your fucking job if all you want is the glory. maybe you weren’t good. maybe you should point out color difference some more. holy fuck already. and theres not just black and white hey. thnks to our government opening the borders all day all night every day, we are now the minority. just shut the fuck up already about how its always a ‘thing’ if some black human can’t go on stage with the whites. the more you shout out your ‘we deserve’ ramblings and then on top of it to say you deserve cause of an increased level of the melanin hormone compared to mine.just for the FACT black actors were in movies this year doesnt mean shit. so? a bunch of asians were probably in movies this year, maybe all of Israel came and shot a movie, does that mean they have to have ‘jewish’ category. come on. saying shit like that keeps you separated and in the spotlight in negative ways like that fuck nut spike lee is. fucking hell you guys. when is enough enough? when is your whole life going to be stop being about the white man the devil hmmm? just shut the fuck up

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